Post Ragnar Thoughts

It has been quite a bit of time since last writing to this blog. In that time, I have steadily built mileage and pace. I recently ran in the Ragnar Relay DC, as runner #3 on a team with friends from Baltimore and Philly. It was a blast. During my first leg, I ascended 1200 feet of elevation gain, most of that over 3 miles. Then descended 1000 feet, which quite honestly was the worst of the two elevation changes. I just hate that pounding on the quads and knees. I'll go uphill all day long. I had a goal of 7:30 pace for the entire run (7.8 miles), and I hit that with room to spare; going over in 7:05 pace. I was happy with that. My other two legs were both well under 7:00, at 4.8 and 3.2 miles in distance.

More importantly, the Ragnar Relay series is not just about times and mileage. It's about building a team bond, and I have become good friends with past teammates after meeting them for a first time at Ragnar. Heck, that's how I met my girlfriend. My favorite moment from our team was on Leg 5, with Kevin running. I was driving the van, and it was a twisty up hill run. The road was just a dusty fire road, and with all of the vans driving up and down it, I don't know how the runner were breathing. We screwed up reading the map, and missed a great spot to meet him with water. We got about halfway down the hill, and realized we should have met him with water given the hill, heat, and dust. So, I hopped out of the van with a crossing-guard flag and water bottle, fought the dust, and humped up a mile up the hill. I got to the top right as did Kevin, only to hear him say, "No thanks, I'm good." It was pretty comical. So, we had a great run down the hill together to the finish. I had just met Kevin two weeks earlier, as he was the emergency fill-in twelfth runner. It was a great opportunity to get to know him a bit better. The new Ragnar motto is "Connect, Conquer, Celebrate", and that's what it's about.

When our team needed that twelfth runner due to an injury, I posted on one of my local running group websites. Someone wrote, I'd rather just run a half marathon than do all that. He obviously didn't understand it, and probably wouldn't until he did one. In fact, I'm not sure most people would understand it until they ran the Ragnar.

Of course, there are plenty of people who run and just don't get it at all. The most annoying thing is to hear someone bitching and moaning about not getting a good sleep, or how miserable it is to run at 3:30 am, or how bad the porta potties are. Talk about first-world problems... I heard so many people stepping out of vans whining about how bad the free coffee is, and how they just can't run without good coffee. "Why don't they get Starbucks to sponsor it?" Sometimes, I think they should change their motto to "Wake Up, Shut up, and Run!" but perhaps I'll save that for the van decorations next time.

Feeling yesterday's run, today

This morning, my plan was to do a "nice" 4-miler, hopefully at 7:30 pace as kind of a recovery from the "fast" 6-miler yesterday. I managed that, in fact it was 4.75 miles at 7:23. But, I felt pretty crappy throughout. My right ankle has been bothering me. Back in PT, the therapist said, "Wow, your ankles are really inflexible, let's work on those." I never really had ankle problems before, but my right ankle is now stiffer than ever since they worked on it. Damn it. It's always something. It took about a mile to loosen it up. I actually considered turning around after 0.25 miles because it was hurting.

My decision for tomorrow is whether to do the Pirate 5k in Havre de Grace, prior to heading up to NJ, or to run with the Pacemakers before the drive to Jersey. Oh decisions.

First time running the Thursday morning "Under Armour" run

At 6:00 am today, I went to the Under Armour Brandhouse in Harbor East. This is a run that a friend, Cory, has put together for a fairly quick pace... around 7:00 min/mile for 6 miles. Most of the other folks... OK the three others today, run there from their respective homes, and run back. I chose to bike down, because running there would have resulted in an overall distance of 10 miles. A little too far to travel for my current fitness level, and the last thing I want to do is push my distance too far , too fast and get laid up again with another injury.

The run goes from the store at Harbor East, along the harbor and some streets (Key Hwy) to the Under Armour HQ, and back again. As advertised, we kept a 7:00 min pace, although I think we started a little quicker than that. It felt good to stretch my legs like that. My last few runs have been slower dur to slower company and that puking incident. It was soupy out there with the humidity. I was soaked about a mile in. The bike ride home actually let me get some real air movement, and helped dry me off and cool me down. Cheers.

First time I have ever puked to start a run

Last night was my usual Tuesday pizza and beer run. It was 93 degrees at the start, and I left my apartment a tad late. So I pushed it to run 7:00's down to the meetup location. This was after drinking a cup of coffee and eating a large spoonful of marinated mushrooms (wonderful pre-run nutrition). My stomach was feeling a little weird for those two miles to the meetup spot, but it wasn't anything I couldn't handle.

We waited about 5 minutes for the last person to show up and headed off for a 5-miler around the harbor. About five steps into it, I let out what I thought would be a small burp... Nope... it was that cup full of coffee and some mushrooms. Thankfully I was right next to a trash can at the time, and managed to hold it till I got over the can. A couple of swishes of water, spit, repeat. Off I went. Of course I was fighting stomach cramps after that, and basically kept it in the 8:30 range for the rest of the run. Felt OK at the end.

Then, on the walk to the pizza joint, we saw quite the storm heading towards us. We ended up sprinting the last three blocks. The wind was so strong that all of the street debris was smacking us in the face. It took a good five minutes of constant blinking in the pizza place to get the stuff out of my eyes.

Last week, I was at 15.6 miles for the week, which doesn't sound like a lot. But, since the IT band flared up, this is the most I have run in one week. This past week, I was able to stay up in Philly with a good friend, and I got to travel the streets of South Philly for a few miles on Monday and Tuesday evenings. Running from Passyunk down Broad to the stadiums and back up. It was the first time running in South Philly, and it was an interesting view of that part of the city.

Last night was the first disgusting run of the year. IT was 83 F and humid when I went out at 6:30. I only did 4 miles, at 7:10 pace, but it felt like I did twice as much. It's the heat, and the humidity, damn it. I can't stand summer for running, and it's not even that hot yet.

Supposedly, I have a video gait analysis scheduled for this coming Wednesday. We'll have to see if I have really improved my form as much as I think I have, or if I have over corrected and am now doing something equally as awful.

So F'ing Foggy

This morning, my run was spent breathing the thick air on the streets of B'more. It was so foggy, I couldn't see the skyline from my bedroom window. It was a cool 65 F. I did a total of 3 miles, down to the Science Center and back. I stopped to take a photo of the USS Constellation and World Trade Center in the fog.

I am slowly getting my legs back under me. Foam rolling before and after the run is proving to be key. I am at about 12 miles per week, increasing by 10% each week.

Two days in a row for the first time...

Yesterday marked the first time I had run two days in a row after the IT band issues came to a head in late January. I put in 2.5 miles on Monday at 7:21 pace, and then I did 4.1 miles last night at 7:00 pace. I felt good after both runs, although I was approaching the end of my endurance limits after the 4-miler. I could feel my form slipping a bit and my stomach was starting to burn. Last night was also the first run in 80+ degree weather. The first part in the city was warm, and I had to dodge crowds around Camden Yards... someone forgot the Tigers were in town. After going through Fed Hill, and getting to the harbor, it was much cooler. Although the last half mile was dead into a stiff headwind. That really tired me out. The Duclaw Sweet Baby Jesus after my run never tasted so good.

I just have to resist the urge to push past the 10% increase per week. It's going to be tough, but I don't want to end up back at square one with another injury.

Progress is being made

I have been given the go ahead to start increasing my mileage by the standard 10% per week. I am still keeping myself to every other day running to allow things to heal. I am thinking that the key to managing this will be foam rolling both before and after a run.

This past weekend, I managed to get a nice 4.5-miler in at Heinz Wildlife Refuge up in Philly on Saturday. A really flat, gravel trail around the wetlands. It was great, because of my running partners that day, E and D. D is actually a German Shorthaired Pointer, who really seemed to be rather lackadaisical about the 8:23 pace we set. I could tell he was capable of more. Sunday, we got up to watch the elites at the 8-mile marker in the Broad Street Run. They were cruising at about 4:45 pace. It was educational to watch their forms as they went by. I would love to have that springy, shock-absorber look to my stride. After some coffee and a pastry, we watched the sweaty masses roll by somewhere between 8:30 and 11:00 paces. Still fun to watch that many people... most of whom were having fun, too.

Last night's run was a 2.7-miler at what I felt was 5k pace. That turned out to be about 6:30 in the shape I'm in. Not, too bad. I tried to meet up with the RG3 Tuesday pizza and beer run, but missed them at the finish. I checked out our usual places, but it appears that they may have gone home after the run rather than partaking of food and booze. Too bad. Maybe next week.

Camden Yards this morning

One o the best things about Camden Yards is that they open the gates on Eutaw St. at 7 AM, so if you can run down there and through the stadium (or at least by a lot of the concessions) in the morning. It's usually pretty quiet, too.

I think I have personally seen Big Papi put four homers onto Eutaw Street. However, I wasn't here for this particular shot:

I know there's a few Troy O'Leary's out there, and a Carl Everett about four feet from Papi's marker.

So, it was two-miles this morning with no issues. Just focusing on form, which is becoming more natural. Arms swinging by my side, hips underneath me, and each foot in its own lane. Alignment and balance. I hope this works. My next jaunt will be the Newport 10-Miler. I will most likely start the race with my sister, run the first mile with her. Then I'll peel off the course and walk it out to either the 7 or 6-mile marker. I'll hopefully not have to wait too long to see her. Then I'll run the last three or four miles in with her. It'll be fun, and hopefully it'll be dry.

Walt Wit

Missed last night's PT appointment because I got stuck in a car with my boss and two others driving back from a meeting in Malvern, PA. The only saving grace was that we stopped at Wegman's on the way home, and I managed to buy a sixer of Philadelphia Brewing Company's Walt Wit. I was hoping that they would have the Kenzinger, but to no avail. Walt Wit is a close second to my taste buds.

Got up this morning and ran two miles; down through Camden Yards and back up again. This time, I figured I would try foam rolling before running to make sure that my IT band was as loose as possible before straining it. It seems to have worked. I didn't feel any twinges. I also rolled after the run for good measure. I guess the real test will be when I wake up tomorrow. Last weekend, it was the waking up on Sunday that revealed a bit of pain in my knees, which felt decent immediately after the run. PT tomorrow: 7:30 am.

Some Thoughts on Boston 2014

First, it was great to see an American, Meb Keflezighi, win it this year.

Second, it was great to see a 38-year-old win it this year. (Guess how old I am???)

Third, it was great to see Brendan Doyle's tribute to his dad, Booby Doyle, with the Johnson & Wales Athletic Club singlet and striped shorts. Link is HERE

Some knee issues again

This past Saturday, I ran 3.3 miles in Hampden. I felt OK for the first mile, but in the second one, I felt a little bit of weird sensation in my left knee of all places. It was the same type of issue I felt in the right knee when dealing with the IT band. Well, upon waking Sunday morning, I had a bit of pain across the anteriolateral part of the knee... uh oh. It was a little twinge, and exactly like I used to feel in December when all these issues started. I am debating a run today, just 2 miles, to see if I can repeat the issue... sounds like a stupid thing, but as an engineer, the first step is often seeing if you can repeat the problem. Or, I may just do some exercises and wait until I see the PT on Tuesday.

Beautiful Run this Morning

I headed out at 6:15 to catch sunrise over the inner harbor. It was a nice 39 F when I went out. Light gloves, long sleeve, and the New Balance 980s. Felt a little bit of pain in my right knee that was apparently totally unrelated to the IT band based on how it felt. It went away after about 0.25 miles. Ran down to the pier next to Little Havana and watched the sun come up with the Domino Sugar factory to the right. Nice. Got about 4 miles total in, maybe a little less. That's probably a bit more than my PT would like, but oh well. It felt OK.

I really can't wait to start stretching out the mileage and just being out for longer periods of time.

Out to 3 miles

Had a good three-miler on Saturday morning. Took a friend down around the stadium and then briefly out to the harbor and back up Charles St to Koffee Therapy for a post-run iced coffee... black no sugar. Didn't feel anything with my knee during the run, but then I was distracted with conversation. However, while doing lunges later that night, I could feel some snapping across the tibial tray of my right knee, which has been where I have consistently felt the pulling on other runs. Still have a weird feeling there this morning. I am going to hold off until tomorrow on running so that I can run with RG3 that night.

In other news, it was great to see PC have its first true home track meet this past weekend. How that program has manged to draw great runners and thrive without facilities is a testament to the coaches there. They have had some great runners while schlepping about, trying to find time on other local tracks. Great news for them: PC Gets a Track

This time 2.4 miles

I purposely stretched my run a bit, out to 2.4 miles this morning. I can still feel the pulling of the IT band as it passes over some of the protrusions of bone. No pain, but it is concerning. It is taking all I have to not push further on distance at this point. I was able to carry a 7:20 pace quite comfortably.

It was a beautiful morning though. About 42 degrees, and the sun had just come up. Nice start to the day. I am looking forward to running this weekend. Might try to take a 3-miler on Saturday, going by some of the House of Cards sites in B'more proper. Apparently, the Underwoods' home is about a mile from me, as is Zoe's apartment.

Ditto.

Another two-miler, same route. No pain, just some pulling sensations. So, status-quo. It is amazing how quickly the fitness level can disappear. I've been doing some very short bike rides (10 min) to keep up fitness and get around. The shitty weather this winter made it harder to keep that up, and the elliptical was bothersome to the knee.

First day back on the road

Wednesday was the first day back out on the road. I never did get the video gait re-analysis, but the PT cleared me for about six to eight miles per week, running every other day, nothing over three miles. I did two miles in the morning yesterday. It was a great temperature for it because I didn't really get warmed up. I felt some slight pulls across the front of my knee, but no pain. I ran straight down Eutaw, then around and through Camden Yards on Eutaw, which was open. It was a nice easy pace, no watch.

The toughest thing was focusing on several form aspects at once: Keeping my hips level and under me, keeping each foot in its own lane, keeping my stride under me rather than reaching out too far, and keeping my arms swinging evenly and out to the side rather than across my body. I couldn't even enjoy the scenery... OK the litter around Lexington Market and such... it was just a constant checking of form in my mind. I know it will eventually become second nature. The T-Rex will soon be extinct.

"All You Deliver"
Jose Gonzalez

On the verge of ruin
You'll see it all clear
How steep the fall is
How long the way back is
On the verge of success
It's all white and fluffy
Horizons are blurred
By the time you reach your goal
Tongues will be twisted
To the point where you'll lose track of your soul
Distorted pictures is all you deliver

Dammit

Still at least a week away from running on the road. I have been feeling some pulling and/or snapping across the front right of my knee. PT doesn't want to chance that going away. On the plus side, the power went out tonight during my session, so no sweating in the Alter G. Next up is a reevaluation of my gait on Thursday. To see if the Alter G has helped at all.

Frustration is setting in

In my fourth week of PT, and the frustration with not being cleared to run on the streets is down right nasty. I am up to 3 miles at 75% weight on the Alter G, but I hate that thing. Especially when the only shorts that were left at the end of the day were a pair of smalls. I think my voice went up an octave after the 3-miler that day.

I walked about four miles yesterday to try to meet my Tuesday night group at our usual pizza spot. Turns out that it was the first Tuesday in a year when no one felt like going out after the run. I had no way of knowing that until I got to place and no one was there. I checked two other bars nearby, to no avail. I posted a message on the site, and someone replied with the bail out info. Darn. At least I got the walking in.

I still feel something in the area of the IT band... not pain, but something.

PT Continuing

PT continues to progress. Last night involved the addition of some new exercises to strengthen the muscles that stabilize the leg during landing. I was actually amazed that there was such a significant difference between my left leg (my leaping leg) and my right leg. I did 3 miles on the Alter G treadmill. I was at 75% weight and pacing at 7:03, with a cadence of 172 spm. In the last 1/10 mile, I could swear I felt something in my knee. Not pain, just something. Mentioned it to the PT, but I didn't feel it during any of the exercises, so maybe it was nothing.

Supposedly 2 weeks out from real road running at low mileage.

The first week of PT

Just finished my first week of physical therapy for the IT band issue that I have. It is not nearly as painful as I thought it would be... so far. I imagine that it will ramp up in intensity as I build some more strength around the hip/glute area of the legs. So far, the worst experience has been running on the Alter G treadmill. I was trying to explain it to some co-workers. Basically, you wear rubber shorts, zip into a bubble, which inflates with air and lifts you by said shorts. It felt OK for about the first 2 minutes, then the air in the bubble got Arizona hot and the compression on the boys was getting to be too much. I was working at 70% weight. I could definitely focus on stride more than on a regular treadmill. I tried hard to keep each foot in its own lane, avoiding the crossover hip whip that I was doing previously. I also focused on a balanced arm swing, without the the floppy T-rex form that I normally use. By the time it ended, I was happy to get out of the thing. The woman before had run 30 minutes in it, which I could not have endured. Perhaps her lack of external genitals aided in her ability to last that long.

Actually during the very first session, which included a stride analysis, I spent 7 minutes on the regular treadmill with no pain. I took that as a good sign for the start of treatment.

Headed to home away from home

Philadelphia, that's my home away from home (Pawtucket). Love to get up there as often as possible. Were it not for a convoluted life story over the past seven years, I'd probably still be living there. Now, it is going to be bittersweet, because I would normally head up there to run with the Melon Monsters (ex-Biohazard Quarantine). But, with the knee injury, that won't be happening. It's a shame. I would love to run the Wissahickon or even on the streets of Philly. Would have been a lot of fun, but that will come. Just have to be patient, which is tough. Damn.

PT Appointment Scheduled

Got my PT appointment scheduled at the running clinic within the Union Harbor Hospital facility. Looking forward to it, because I am going nuts without being able to run. I have already put on about 5 lbs, and have been suffering from Netflix fatigue at night. I tried the eucalyptical, but that did not go well, nor did the bike. Both caused pain in the knee within the first two minutes. On another positive note, the last two days have been the first two without pain while walking to and from work. I am taking that as a good sign, but I am scared as crap to run on it and re-inflame the IT band. I am seriously hoping that within a month, this again becomes my running blog.

Ortho results are in... IT band gets the square for the win. The MRI showed severe inflammation and fluid around the IT band. So, that is good news, right? No tears: structurally it looks "perfect". However, therapy will start with manual "freeing up" of the IT band... translation: pain. Can't wait.

Winter has always been my favorite season. Funny that I'm saying that as someone who loves golf as much as I do. But, really, for running, you can't beat winter. And, running is where I can leave it all behind... even the stress of a bad round of golf. So, when I can't run, I have discovered that winter sucks. I'd love to be out there, even if I were that chick who busted ass on that news report about running in the snow.

Hopefully things will start to turn around for me soon.

Ortho Appointment Tomorrow

Tomorrow is my appointment with the orthopaedist. The knee pain has just been too much to bear while running. I don't want my first marathon to be the last one, so I have decided to pull out of the Lower Potomac River Marathon. I still have the goal of being ready for the Newport 10 Miler to run with my sister.

Sprigs and Health.

Just an update on a product that I have been using recently. It's the Sprigs Banjees Wrist Wallet in black mesh. Now, I have some slightly Schlecked out arms, for you cycling fans out there.

So, I don't wear mine on the wrist, rather I pull it up to my elbow. Usually, I will wear it right at the elbow, so that my ID, key card, and credit card sit at the medial bend in the elbow. It is so comfortable there that I hardly notice it while running. I have even carried a phone, iPhone 3GS - no case, and it has been comfortable. Occasionally, if I am feeling particularly Schlecky, I can even pull it up over my elbow and wear it on the upper arm. It's light weight, unobtrusive, and functional. Just thought I would share.

Tonight, I am hitting the elliptical just to see how the knee will respond. I am scheduled to do 21 this Saturday, if I am following the marathon training that the Pacemakers have set out. Ugh, not sure I could make it that far, but we'll see. I am trying to be optimistic.

I keep thinking about the Lower Potomac River Marathon as a goal race for which I want to be healthy. Not sure I can do that, and even more so, I want to be healthy for the Newport 10 Miler up in RI. I told my sister I would run it if she did. It's her goal race after two kids, a knee scope, and a new house. She doesn't know it, but my plan is to pace her home at whatever her goal time is, and to mule her water and gels. I'm looking forward to it, and I would be more disappointed in missing that opportunity than any other run this year.

Pressures in college...

Was just reading about this sad story about a college track student who committed suicide due to stresses she put upon herself over grades and her performance on the track: Link.

Penn is my alma mater, at least for grad school, and as a teaching assistant, I saw some of those pressures in the kids there. One poor freshman came to me in tears because she was on track to get a B+ in an intro course. She was so nervous that it would ruin her chances at med school and that her father would berate her. I was really taken aback by this. She was deserving of a B+ based on her performance, and she never came to review sessions or office hours, until the final. I felt badly for her, especially about the fact that she felt she would sorely disappoint her father with a B+. I tried to be of some support with, "Look, if the worst thing that happens during your four years here is that you get a B+ in this class, you'll have no problem getting into med school." I really wanted to give her some perspective on it. She ended up getting a solid B+ because that was what her performance level warranted. I had no say in the final grade, it was up to the professor. I just hoped that her parents would be supportive of it as well. But, if she got that worked up over an intro class, God bless her when/if she did go to med school.

It's a shame that kids feel these extreme pressures. It's a shame that some parents put these pressures on kids. It appears that the girl in the story had a loving, supportive family, and she was lucky for that. They tried, and my hear goes out to her family, especially because they tried. Kids, thrust into a new university environment, particularly those that excelled in high school, are so vulnerable to self-imposed pressure. It's also a shame that her running, which I am sure she enjoyed in high school, seems to have also contributed to those stresses. I hope this story does open some parents' eyes to another kid with these problems, and that they are able to help their child through it.

Troubling Knee Troubles

This past Saturday saw a Pacemaker's run from Panera up on York Rd. down to the Harbor and back up to Panera. 14 miles. As I told one of my running mates, "It was really only the last 12 miles that were painful." My knee has gotten to the point where running is painfully unenjoyable. It is the extension of the right knee, as my foot reaches out for the ground, that causes the pain. I found myself running rather stiff-legged to avoid flexing the knee past 45 degrees. Not ideal by any means. The really odd thing is that it hurts less the fast I go. It also hurts less when I run on a left-to-right camber (think right side of the road). The pain is on the lateral side, just below the patella up to the pivot of the knee. It seems to be lower than most people who experience IT band syndrome, but that doesn't necessarily rule it out. According to the video on this Runner's World page the pain that sits lower than the IT band could be a lateral meniscus tear. However, I haven't had any swelling whatsoever, and from what I have read this is a typical symptom of a meniscal tear.

Taking a week off to see if that helps.

50+

This has been my first ever rolling week with 50+ miles. Took yesterday off, and boy did I need that. I haven't been sleeping well, and that wasn't helping the recovery from those 50+ miles.

Tonight's run was an extended harbor run (8.2 mi), I took it past my normal turnaround and went on to Canton; even with Starsuck's on Boston. Damnedest thing is that my knee was really bugging me tonight, after the night off. I had to stop twice, flex it back, and massage the lateral side of the patella and tibia. Really frustrating. It felt a bit better if I picked up the pace and concentrated on flicking my foot out front as my stride was extending. This seemed to force my knee to go completely straight and feel looser on the footfall. Oh well, I'll debate a day off tomorrow prior to Saturday's longer group run.

Two runs in a row now, when standing on the north side of the bldgs and some open sky above, the Garmin Performance 10 has found its location w/in 30 sec. Not too bad.

Blowing Off Dinner with the Boss.

Guess what I did last night... the harbor run. 7.82 miles of blah.

Tonight I was a bit more adventurous. First, I blew off a work dinner where I was supposed to be meeting our sales team. I just couldn't stomach another moment of work intruding on my life, so I said fuck it. I threw on my Newtons, and I just headed out at 5:30 to meet the RG3 group. I put in 4 miles before meeting them and ended up doing another 7.8 with them.

At first I was going to try to make this a social run (8:00 min pace), but I saw four guys take off from the start at about 7:30 pace. I then watched as no one was talking to one another in that group, and it started to string out. So, I took off to try to bring it together with some friendly chatter. Only, one guy just thrust forward and kept pushing so I hung with him. I figured if I could sit behind his right shoulder, I might get him to slow down a bit and let the others catch up. He just kept going at 7:40's or so. He was new to the group, only gave one word answers, and didn't know his way around the waterfront.

I stuck with him long enough to guide him out for 30 minutes, and then get him back to the main harbor area. However, I knew that my bag of warmer clothes was sitting in the Brit's car, and that the others in the group were probably waiting for us, as we had ventured further than the rest of the group. I turned in two miles at or below 6:00 and caught the Brit as he was heading to the pizza place. I got my bag and went out to locate the new guy.

Turns out he was in shock at how fast he had gone. He typically runs 9:00's, and he laughed when I told him he was doing 7:40's and I was trying to get him to slow down. He seemed happy with it, but I wish the group had stayed together for some conversation. Anyway, Pub Dog pizza and about 2.5 beers later I was ready to go home.

A text message, voicemail, and email from my boss wondering where I was. Like I said, fuck it.

Running with James Taylor

I thought yesterday was going to be an off-day, after the 18-miler on Saturday. But, a guy I know (James Taylor), posted about doing a 9-miler from Patterson Park over to Fed Hill and back. Well, I didn't want to drive over to Patterson to run, so I just said I'd meet him along the way. It worked out nicely. I met James Taylor along Aliceanna, I did an about face, and the two of us continued along the Harbor, over to Fed Hill, up Fort, and went our separate ways when we hit Pratt again. The great thing about running with James is that he likes an 8:30 pace (7.5 miles total), which was nice for a recovery run for me.

The best part about the run is that my knees are not bothering me as of 9:00 am, the day after the run. A good sign.

Almost forgot, it took the Garmin about 1 mile to find a signal. I waited for two minutes before my run for it to acquire a signal, but to no avail. So I started.

18-miler (Almost)

Yesterday's 18-mile run (actually 17.8 miles according to Map My Run) went off in the mist and fog from McHenry Row at 7:00 am. It was my first run using the Garmin Performance 10 watch. I went with that watch because I wanted something that was affordable, simple, and allowed internet upload. First impressions are mixed right now. I have never used a GPS watch before, and I was unfamiliar with how long it might take to acquire the satellites, but it took 1.5 miles before it locked on. Maybe moving while trying to acquire a signal is non-ideal, but the group was leaving and I had no choice. Interesting thing was that my running partner for the first 5 miles also was new to the Performance 10. His watch experienced a similar length of time to acquire a signal. Guess I just need to start the watch sooner. Also, it seemed to cut some big corners that may have caused me to be about 0.3 miles short or so. Need more time with the watch.

Temperature was nice, but I went out without water. Whoops. Didn't realize that it wasn't going to be a bowtie run, where we loop through the start-finish point multiple times. The route sheet sent us out 9 miles before turning back towards the finish. I stopped at Dunkin' to hit the bathroom and buy a bottle of water. Thankfully I had found a few bucks in my pocket that must have been hanging around from the last time I wore those shorts. Hopefully my knee and right achilles will be OK after this run. Both were nagging me by the end of the run.

Always run with ID

Here's a story about a runner who collapsed without ID.Link I'm not saying ID would have saved his life, but you never know when it could.

Folks, always run with ID. I use the Road ID system, but even a business card will work (although they can get kind of soggy).

Just flipping through Level Renner, and came across this photo by Chris Spinney:

It's a great finish line shot. Love the lean in. I hope I am pounding out 5:10s in 20 years. Here's the full post: Link

"A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds, adored by little statesmen and philosophers and divines." - Emerson

Ah, the Inner Harbor route. The above quote was suggested to me by a running mate of mine a few weeks back when I complained how I always run that route. My old standby. I run it way too often. It's only real redeeming quality is the finish going up Charles St. into Mt. Vernon. Other than that, it is a security blanket. 7.82 miles of comfort. Passing the occasional tourist (many more in summer, for sure) and nodding to the occasional runner. It's a B'more cliche.

At least on Monday I ran a slight variation on the Inner Harbor route that went up Fells Rd for about a quarter mile before finding the promenade again. That was on a 10k jaunt, as I was trying to make it back in time for the AU v. FSU game. If any Auburn fan tells you that they expected more than 7-4 from this team at the beginning of the year, they are lying to you (except for that dude that bought that ticket in Vegas... he's legit). I also realize that it took three small miracles to make it this far. It was a great year despite the loss. There's something that Auburn alumni will say, even after a loss like that... "It's great to be an Auburn Tiger!" That's all I can say. I can't wait for next year, too.

Just got back from a 21-miler this morning. It was 16 F when we kicked off at 7:00 am. The great thing about running with the Baltimore Pacemakers is that there is no shortage of "idiots" like myself who will run regardless of the weather. I would say we had at least 20 people there. The other great thing about running with this group is that those same "idiots", who braved the slop and ice this morning, are really cool people with whom you can have some good conversations while running or having coffee after the run. That's what really keeps me coming back each time.

This run literally spanned Baltimore. All sorts of footing issues. But, I learned about a product called Yaktrax which one of the guys used to great effectiveness in the ice and snow. May have to check them out.

I think I am going to take a hot bath, something I haven't done in years. Hopefully my tub is clean.

Last night's run involved blowing winds, biting snow, and a bit of fun. 8 miles on the Inner Harbor. Had to wear my old New Balance 603 hikers in order to have some traction, the Newtons were not cutting it. I made it about a block in Newtons before deciding that was a path towards personal injury.

While the run was a constant battle of keeping my lenses clear enough so that I would not stumble into the harbor, I did have some fun along the way. I crossed paths with six other runners, although I was the only idiot in shorts. Also got to see the Baltimore Under Armour store promoting Auburn as they go for a BCS Championship. War Eagle.

Back to the Hustle

I saw American Hustle last night. I might be the only person with whom I have spoken that really did not like it. Yes, Christian Bale was good in his role as Irv, but the rest of it just seemed like an over-the-top ripoff of a Guy Ritchie film. Anyway... I am back at blogging. I need an outlet to document my bitching and moaning as well as my running. Sometimes, I'll even bitch and moan about running. I miss it, but I just haven't had time.

2013 was a hot and cold year for me. I graduated beyond the 10k for the half-marathon distance. Ran two of those in the first half of the year. Got injured in June during the Ellicott City 10k, and I was probably running my best ever at that point. Damn sesamoiditis cost me all of July and August. Came back to knock off two of my "Races to do" list: The Nittany Valley Half Marathon and the Nooseneck 18k.

Both were hilly, with long sustained downhills that had me swearing. I can go uphill all day long, but gravity is a bitch, and she kills my quads and flexors. But, overall, despite a niggling knee tweak from the Blue Hills up in Canton, MA, I feel like I'm in decent shape. I am currently training for the Lower Potomac Marathon.

Cheers.

Running with RG3 in Fed Hill

No, not that RGIII, this RG3. Apparently they had the name first. Ended up being a 7.75 mile run total at about 7:40 pace. I was running with a guy who had a metatarsal fracture this past summer/fall, and it sounded an awful lot like what I have been dealing with my toe... although that's just from two runners comparing war stories. Who knows? It was a decent run, a little slower pace than normal, but that's fine because I was feeling it from last night's run for some reason. Afterwards, pizza and beer at Social Pub & Pie. Always good pizza and good beer. Also as per usual, good conversation. A very social group, and one that I am glad I found.

Summary:
Miles: 7.75 - Inner harbor
Calories Burned: 900
Calories consumed: 2443 (Carb = 0.44, Fat = 0.36, Protein = 0.12, Alcohol = 0.08)

I dub thee, "Super Toe"!

I think I found a solution for my toe problems, and I term it the "super toe". Basically taping my three middle toes into one cohesive unit has distributed any stress among the three toes and has served to stabilize the middle one. This is the toe that went south on me last night. In my Nike Frees, I was able to get through 8 miles this afternoon with only one tweak that I felt. That was when my right toes got caught going up a curb cut, and they flexed a bit too much. I focused the entire run on a nice, level mid-foot strike and it was smooth. I am hoping this bodes well for the upcoming half. Oh, I also fought the vurps again, the last two miles this time. Damn beef burrito.

Summary:
Miles: 8 - Catonsville, MD (w/a 350 ft elevation gain over 4 miles - not steep, but not cheap either)
Calories burned: 910 (according to Map My Run)
Calories consumed: 1886 (0.46 Carb, 0.40 fat, 0.14 protein) - damn beef burrito

Bum Toe and a Hard Shoulder

Well, today was a very frustrating run. I had planned on about 7 miles, but just had to shut it down after about 3.1 miles due to the toe on my right foot acting up. I was running really well, despite fighting off a case of the vurps for the first two miles. Too much beer last night, and too much coffee today. I had just gotten them out of my system, when I flexed my toe downward on a stride. Not sure why I did it, but it was a conscious action. Next thing I know, my toe has a really sharp pain in it. The middle toe on my right foot, has been tender on the top, with some swelling right where the toe meets the foot. Not sure exactly what is going wrong with it... broken, sprained, strained, torn... but it all goes back to last Saturday with those damn Newton shoes... I am sure of it. So, I have a week before the Caesar Rodney half, and I am pulling lame after 5k with a hurt toe. Not looking good.

Summary:
Calories burned: 404
Calories consumed: No idea... there was eggs benedict involved at breakfast.
Injuries: toe is worrisome at best.

As an aside, I saw a very interesting movie at the DC Indie Film Fest on Friday night. It was Hard Shoulder, a British "genre-bender" from director Nicholas Lean (his first film, actually). I have to say that about half way through it, I was thinking what is the point of all the sexual deviance, physical violence, and threats of much more to come. It was really starting to taste like a Saw or Hostel type of flick, which is not my thing. It wasn't making any sense to me. Then, with one abrupt scene, it all made sense. There were hints of what was really going on throughout the film, but that jolt made everything apparent. All of the "pointless" violence and sexual assault suddenly had a purpose, and I was thankful for that.

At the end of the movie, Lean held a question and answer session, and you could tell from his answers that he really did set out to make something that was much more than a shock-horror film. According to him, "some parts were autobiographical..." And, I have to say that some of the emotions experienced by the protagonist, and some of the threats and intentions of the antagonists were somewhat familiar to me. I remembered thinking during parts of the film that I had often felt the same denigrations that the protagonist was undergoing. So, some of the emotions, while portrayed in a shocking, overtly violent manner, really resonated in me. I could relate to the character and his desperation to act like the person that he wanted to be.

Very interesting.

PS - As a further aside, shown with Hard Shoulder was a short entitled Head's Up. As I was watching the short, I was trying to figure out where I knew one of the actors from... turns out it was Poet from Oz, Craig muMs Grant. Pretty funny, very well shot film. If you want to see it, I think you can contact the film maker through the website to find a link for it.

Boston and Back

Last night's elliptical session never materialized. But, tonight was 8.77 miles down to Canton and back (with a few spurs). I probably was at about 7:10 pace or so; didn't take a watch. I did come across a rat so large that I stopped to let him cross the street. Of course, this being Baltimore, he jaywalked. Otherwise, I felt damn good during and after the run.

Summary:
Calories burned: 981 (according to Map My Run
Calories Consumed: 1712 (Carb: 0.57, Fat: 0.30, Prot: 0.13)

Seems that my diet is more reactionary than proactive. I'll have to start working on that.

Not doing as well as I thought would.

Following up my last post... Apparently the "pinched nerve" in my toe has turned out to be something else. When it happened, it felt just like the start of my previous neuroma. However after running on Sunday, it was apparent that something else was going on. The pain in my toe was rather bad at 0.25 miles, dull at 0.5 miles, and gone after 1 mile. Great. I did a nice 6.25 miles at 7:10 pace into a stiff headwind for half of the loop. When I got home, the top of my toe, extending onto the top of my foot was swollen and bruised. Funny, because it really hadn't bothered me for the last 5.25 miles. Oh well, I'll try to baby it as much as possible.

Summary:
Miles: 6.25
Calories burned: 686 Calories consumed: 1400 (Carb: 0.70, Fat: 0.22, Prot: 0.08)

Monday - I had every intention of running, but work got in the way of that. I was at an ISPE conference in Baltimore, and I had to take care of stuff in the lab after that. Which left me about 15 minutes before I had to be at Capital Grille for a dinner with fellow speakers from the conference. I didn't even keep track of calories, as it would not have been pretty.

Tuesday - Kind of the same story as above, including leftovers from Capital Grille. Same damaging calorie count.

Wednesday - Winter storm Saturn is hitting, which is really just a fizzled out storm that is alternating between rain and snow. Wind is brutal though. Tonight will be an elliptical evening, I swear.

At least my toe has been getting some rest.

I have recently started reading the book Faster than Forty, which was given to me on my recent 37th birthday by my sister. Faster than Forty is first-hand account of what it took one ex-college runner to make it to Masters level champion at the age of 40. It logs his training regimen, discusses methods (both his and those of others), diet, inspiration, and pain. One of the most striking things about the book, was that the dedication of the primary author, Mark Gomes, to documenting his training. Every mile, whether it was on the streets or on the stairs was recorded and analyzed. As scientist, I can appreciate this, and that is what I would like to try to do with this space. Henceforth, the Parched Problematic Porter will serve as a space for me to document my journey from 37-year old scientist/distance runner/cranky-ex-Rho-Dielander to a 40-year old scientist/hopefully better distance runner/still-cranky-ex-Rho-Dielander.

This morning, I awoke with two notable pains in my toes after a 13-mile run yesterday through Baltimore. That was my first run over 9 miles in distance since about early-December. Lots of little injuries (some precipitated by indoor soccer) and illnesses have impeded progress.

The first pain is in my right foot. At about mile 10, I pulled up with what I can only describe as a pinched nerve under the third toe on my right foot. I have had this before, on the left foot, and it actually devolved into a self-diagnosed neuroma that was rather painful. I now officially blame my current set of Newton shoes for this issue. When I experienced the last one, it was when I had started going over 10 miles in my Newtons. Eventually I went back to an old set of Nike Free shoes, and the problem went away. Now, back in Newtons for a longer run, and bang another nerve issue. Like someone sticking a knife up between my toe and the ball of my foot. I was rotating shoes, but now it appears that I may have to ditch the Newtons and stick with the Frees. They're cheaper anyway.

The second pain is on left foot; what may be the start of athlete's foot between my big and second toes. Ahhh Trichophyton, you little bastard. The perils of running and training. At least this one is easy to fix.

Summary
Miles run: 13 (Canton, Downtown, Fed Hill)
Calories burned: 1457
Calories consumed: 2631 (Carb: 0.47, Fat: 0.41, Prot: 0.12)

Mayor Street is incompetent

Ok, everyone in Philly knows that Mayor Street is incompetent, and that the only reason he was re-elected was that the unions and the African-American population of Philadelphia would never vote for a white Republican. His latest blunder involves the smoking-ban in city restaurants and bars. Just this past weekend, he announced that the ban would go into effect on Monday, September 25.
Fine. The law was passed by city council months ago, and Mayor Street waited until the very last minute to sign it into effect. Initially it was announced that the law would actually take effect January 7, 2007. Great. That would give everyone a nice transition period into the smoking ban.
But, in an act that can only be considered political grandstanding, Mayor Street puts the no-smoking law into effect in only a week's time. Now, this would be fine if they had used the many months that the bill sat on Street's desk to prepare. But, no. The city is absolutely unprepared to deal with this new law. The Health Department has no formal waiver process for "drinking establishments" and "private clubs." There is no enforcement task force in place. There was no formal announcement sent to restaurant and bar owners, unless you count ABC6 Local News a formal announcement. Even the City Hall website is devoid of any announcement about the law. Just Street's ugly mug and muffin-top hair-do smiling away at how healthy the city will be.
This is just another piece of evidence in the mounting case that Mayor Street never had the appropriate foresight to run a city. Right now, it looks like Michael Nutter is the leading (and possibly only candidate) to succeed Mayor Street. He was the real force behind the smoking-ban, and has come out to criticize the Mayor for a) sitting on the bill for so long and b) haphazardly initiating the ban without thinking of the city and it's business owners. I for one, will be thankful when Street's reign of mismanagement and borderline corruption is over.

Back Again?

Well, we'll see if this lasts longer than the one day that my last blogging comeback lasted. Hmmm.


I don't really have any of my usual topics to write about. I guess I'll wait until tomorrow to get fired-up about something. The one thing that has kind of pissed me off this weekend is the fact that my in-laws wait forever to cash a check. We have a loan from our in-laws to do some work on our house, and payment is due promptly at the first of each month. And, believe me, if the check isn't there by the second of the month we get a phone call asking if we forgot to send the check. Today I looked at the bank statement, and they still haven't cashed the check from September 1st. Back in July, they waited until the 22nd to cash the July and June checks.

Well that was throughly unsatisfying. Guess I am not angry enough.

This morning was the first morning where I walked out the door and didn't think, "It's a tit bit nipply out." It was nice to feel the warm spring air outside, despite having to get into a car to go to the gym. I would much rather be riding my bike than driving a car, but the wife went to the gym too so that necessitated the car. Her bag is too big for her to handle on a bike. So many hair products and make-up, I can't even fathom needing all that shit every morning.
I did get out and ride to work on Wednesday morning, and man had I forgotten how hard my saddle was. It wasn't the ride to work that was bad, but it was the ride home that really hurt. My ass felt every little bump in the road. I guess it will take a week or two to get used to it.

Update and blogging for me?

I am not sure if blogging is good for me, but at least it gives me an outlet through which to vent. I have noticed that since I stopped blogging, I seem to have more stress. Now, that maybe because I stopped blogging due to all the shit that I have to do, which in turn could be the real source of my stress. But, hey, blogging can't hurt.

Now, in the past, most of my blog has dealt with the Shrew and her constant annoyance of my wife and me. Well, I am happy to report that we are Shrew free since July 15, 2005. We sold our condo and moved to a house that is still in the city limits. While I know the Shrew was a source of constant pain for me, she also gave me some great stories. I do kind of miss her in that respect.

We sold our condo to a med student at one fo the local universities here. Now, our condo had a Yahoo! group where people kvetched about various problems and issues. I am still a member on it, and I go there to read all the shit that makes me glad we left. One day I come across a post from our nextdoor neighbor, the quiet ones not the Shrew. Here is the post:

I am curious to know if there is a specific procedure for making
noise complaints and also if there are any condo association
penalties for being disruptively loud. It is currently 3:30 in the
morning and my neighbor's party is still going strong. I politely
asked that they keep the noise down and that produced no result. I
just went to the front desk, but the security guard told me that he
had already been up three times to ask my neighbor to quiet down
(apparently he had received other complaints) and there was little
left for him to do.

This post brought me great joy as it was obviously the guy to whom we sold the condo. Now, I feel bad for the quiet neighbors, but this also means that the Shrew had to deal with the noise all night long too! Awesome. Too bad that I haven't seen any more posts of that nature. I was hoping he would throw wild sex orgies every week, and drive the Shrew out. Vengeance is mine!

Blogging good for me?

I am not sure if blogging is good for me, but at least it gives me an outlet through which to vent. I have noticed that since I stopped blogging, I seem to have more stress. Now, that maybe because I stopped blogging due to all the shit that I have to do, which in turn could be the real source of my stress. But, hey, blogging can't hurt.

Now, in the past, most of my blog has dealt with the Shrew and her constant annoyance of my wife and me. Well, I am happy to report that we are Shrew free since July 15, 2005. We sold our condo and moved to a house that is still in the city limits. While I know the Shrew was a source of constant pain for me, she also gave me some great stories. I do kind of miss her in that respect.

We sold our condo to a med student at one fo the local universities here. Now, our condo had a Yahoo! group where people kvetched about various problems and issues. I am still a member on it, and I go there to read all the shit that makes me glad we left. One day I come across a post from our nextdoor neighbor, the quiet ones not the Shrew. Here is the post:

I am curious to know if there is a specific procedure for making
noise complaints and also if there are any condo association
penalties for being disruptively loud. It is currently 3:30 in the
morning and my neighbor's party is still going strong. I politely
asked that they keep the noise down and that produced no result. I
just went to the front desk, but the security guard told me that he
had already been up three times to ask my neighbor to quiet down
(apparently he had received other complaints) and there was little
left for him to do.

This post brought me great joy as it was obviously the guy to whom we sold the condo. Now, I feel bad for the quiet neighbors, but this also means that the Shrew had to deal with the noise all night long too! Awesome. Too bad that I haven't seen any more posts of that nature. I was hoping he would throw wild sex orgies every week, and drive the Shrew out. Vengeance is mine!

The Shrew is Single

Well, it finally happened. The Shrew is single. Although I don't think it occurred the way that I would have liked it to happen.
She has been fairly quiet in the past two weeks. No squealing, no yelling, no banging and moaning. I haven't heard her boyfriend over there. I guess she and he broke up. I have a feeling it was she who kicked him to the curb though, which is really not the way I wanted it to go down. Because, now she can feel superior to him. He really should have done it to her for being such a terrible human being. It justifies her behavior all these months. If he had dumped her, maybe she would have taken a good long look in the mirror and said, "You know what? I am going to change! I am not going to be a miserable bitch who screams about every little thing that goes wrong in my life. I am going to be cheerful. I am not going to belch like a trucker (apologies to any truckers, just steroetyping here), and I am not going thunder through the halls like my daddy owns this building!"
If it only it were that way. Instead, she berates the doorman if he doesn't immediatley recognize her (personally I think he does it for shits and giggles). "I live here! I tell you that everytime you ask me, 'Can I help you?'" She still cranks her tv up. And her new thing is this alarm clock that plays the theme to the Godfather at 6:00 am. Now I would be OK, but she hits snooze, and fucking Don Corleone walks into my bedroom every eight minutes for the next hour and a half! I have to get over there to talk to her about that. I always forget when I get home from work. But, I am reminded at 6:00 am every morning. Damn!

The Center Line

The rain drops fall, making the asphalt slick and oily. The wipers flail to my left, slapping me with water. The brine, running from my helmet to my lips, reminds me of rides past. Slipping between cars and buses, my speed is accentuated by the lack of a steel cage surrounding me. I am free.

Small joy of the day

On my way home tonight, I stopped off at Trader Joe's for some frozen vegetables and assorted meats. I like to hit that place every so often, especially when I can't make it to the local market before it closes. I threw all the frozen food in my bag, threw it on my back, and started pedalling. After about a minute, I noticed a nice, cool sensation across my back. It stayed with me for the rest of my all-too-short ride home. You just can't get that with panniers.

My bank (Citizens) sucks

Yesterday I went to the bank to deposit our IRS refund check. It was made out to both my wife and me. I was the only one who endorsed the check, and they would not let me deposit the check into my account. Both parties have to sign the check. This makes banking inconvenient. If it is made to both of us, why can't only one of us endorse it for deposit? I could see if I were trying to cash the check, but I was trying to put it into my account.
This brings up another point. Three times now, we have tried to add my name to my wife's account and create a joint account. All three times we have left the bank with the assurances that my name is there, and that I will be able to make withdrawals, write checks, and everything else that an account holder can do. Then when I go to withdraw money from the account, the bank won't let me because my name is not on the account. I explain that my name should be on the account. They tell me I have to speak with customer service. Of course, customer service can't do anything because my wife is not there. And, to make matters worse, the account is still under her maiden name. That means she has tried to change her name on the account four times, and it has failed.
I am thinking that it would be easier to just close the accounts and walk across the street to start a new account with another bank.

A murder of crows

So today for some reason I had the line from the Simpsons, "Murder, Marge. A flock of crows is called a murder," stuck in my head. It came from an earlier post on bikeforums about exploding toads. I looked up murder, and found a whole bunch of synonyms for flocks/herds of animals. Some of the more interesting were:

cete,

a company of badgers

exaltation,

a flight of larks

gam,

a school of whales, or a social congregation of whalers, especially at sea

sounder,

a herd of wild boar

That was my edification for the day.

Bike repairs in the lab.

A month or so ago, there was an incident in the lab where one of the gas lines leading to the CVD furnace ruptured. The woman running the furnace just stood there like a bumbling idiot while some sort of gas was just rushing into the room. So, I asked her what type of gas was over there, no answer, just more stammering. Normally there are three gases running; hydrogen, acetylene, and argon. Two out of the three are flammable, so I figure someone should go turn them off. I run over to the tanks to try ot turn it off, only to find out that it was actually ammonia that was leaking. It felt like someone punched me in the face. I ended up going to the hospital for a check-up, but everything was OK.

On Friday the offical incident report was published. No where does the report mention that the person running the experiments was never officially approved by the department chair as a visitng scientist. It does mention that the tubing used was probably insufficient for the application. It also makes a point of noting that "It appeared that someone was performing bicycle repairs in the lab." So, now the only person who is going to catch shit over this whole thing is me, the person making bicycle repairs in the lab. Now this had nothing to do with the incident, and I question the validity of it being included in the official report. I do acknowledge that the lab is not the appropriate place for bicycle repairs, and I have been working this morning to remedy that. However, a corrective action for this situation should hnot have been listed that involved the bikes. It should have been a separate issue.

Middle-Aged Hotness

I just got the Jennifer Anniston email of pictures that she took at Courtney Cox-Arquette's kid's baptism. I have to say that Jennifer is looking pretty sexy still. She is kind of getting that middle-aged hotness. Which is completely different from the young hotness that she used to have. I think I have grown to appreciate the middle-aged hotness more than the young hotness, because it takes so much more to attain and maintain. Young girls have that hotness given to them, often by good genes, it's easy. But, twenty years later you have to be working to acheive that head-turning quality. Eating well, the gym, staying out of too much sun, and (most-key here) having good hair. Some women, once they hit middle-age, they go get some old looking haircut. Ugh. Carmella Soprano (yes, I know she is a character from an HBO show) is a prime example. Here she is getting divorced, back on the market, and what does she do? She get a haircut straight off the Golden Girls set. Women, if you are middle-aged, err on the side of a young haircut. Pick up a copy of seveteen, turn to the photos of the Olsen twins or Lindsey Lohan, take it to your hairdresser, and say, "I want that!"

Two women I can't wait to see in Middle Age - Tiffany Amber Theissen and Melissa Joan Hart. Clarissa can explain it to me all night long!

Good weekend.

I finally got to take the wife to the driving range to bang some range balls. She hadn't swung a club in over a year, since she left Hotlanta. I have to say she did quite well. I was impressed at how well she picked it right back up. I on the other hand hit them like shit. I had this slight cramp in the lawer left abdomen that was bothering me. I stopped swinging after about ten balls, because it has always been my experience that I will do my swing more harm than good by continuing to hit them like shit. But, it didn't matter to me that I didn't get to hit a lot of balls. I just enjoyed watching her hit them and getting her to focus on the fundamentals of her swing. I am looking forward to many more weekend like that this summer.

Pursuing this farther...

So Asli got back to the Super Mario Bros look-a-like that said he was the best at giving women oral pleasure: (I misspelled moustache on purpose)

Hi,

I wanted to get back to you as soon as possible. I am still interested in pursuing this further. I can't host due to my roomie being kind of uptight about me bringing guys home. She would really freak out if she knew we had met on Craig's List too. I have a car, so it is possible for me to go to your place. Of course I would want to meet somewhere in public for a drink to feel you out first. I hope you understand. I want to keep this an internet only thing right now, so I'm going to just try to do this over email.

I've never been with a guy who had a mustache. I imagine it might tickle, but that can be a good thing. Guess I'll just have to wait and see.

AG

So, here is Rrob's response. It sounds to me like he is probably married which makes it all the more sleezy. I can't believe he would get a hotel room on a whim just to meet some chick who might let him lick her.

hi again...thanks for getting back to me. i cant host right now but we can meet some place and go get a room (on me). i know that doesnt sound romantic but for now thats all we can do. drinks sound good. when is a good time for you, and where would you like to meet? and as for my mustache, i KNOW you will like it!
hope to hear from you soon.

rob

I am beginning to wonder if this is some girl on the other end that is just messing with people, like I think I am doing to Rob.

Craig's List Exchange

So, I decided to take the route of answering a Craig's List ad for free oral sex for a woman from a man. I can't really believe that many women contact these guys, so it'll probably get their hopes up. I chose the following listing:

Original CL Posting

Reply to: anon-67973971@craigslist.org
Date: 2005-04-11, 5:15PM EDT

If you like to reveive oral sex, I'm your man!! I'm the BEST, and can go down on you for as long as you can stand it!! You don't have to reciprocate. I don't even have to take off my clothes...all you have to do is ENJOY!!!! Please be height and weight proportionate. Your pic gets mine.

Posing as some 21 year old girl named Asli Guven (apologies to any real Asli Guvens out there) I replied with the following:

Hi,

I saw your CL posting, and it kind of piqued my interest. I am 5' 4", and about 105 lbs, is this proportional enough for you? I have darker hair (reddish to brown depending on time of year), and blue eyes. I am student at one fo the local universities, and I am just looking for some stress relief. I expect someone to be D/D free. I attached a picture (from my last trip out west to visit some friends) sorry it might not be the sexiest, but hopefully it does me justice. I hope you were serious about sending a picture. Maybe we can meet up?

AG

To which the Craig's List poseter responded:

I dont know what you're talking about...you are VERY sexy!! here is my pic...if you are interested PLEASE let me know...i can give you the relief you need!!!! if you like what you see you can call me...610.203.1331 if i dont answer, please leave a message, or you can
e-mail me back and we can take it from there. this is not the best pic of me, i have lost weight since this picture.

RB

I am thinking that we need to set up a date for these two to meet. I wonder where.

No response yet

I haven't had any responses to share from the Craig's List post below. Maybe tomorrow. Or maybe there isn't as much anonymous internet sex going on as I thought there might be. I know that a friend of a friend paid for a woman to fly from Ohio to Nashville, and they just banged all weekend long. Of course, this is a friend of a friend, so it is all just hearsay. And, let me clarify, I in know way will follow through with the post. It is just there for laughs; to see what is out there. I thought about answering a few of the posts on Craig's List to see what people have to say. Maybe I will do that. I can't imagine what will be in those replies. Well, I can, but in some ways that sickens me.

Messing with Craig's List

I am always amazed at the ads in Craig's List for "Casual Encounters." I wondered what type of responses guys who are seeking women get. So, I created the fictional character below. I'll post replies here.

Hi,
I just got out of a long term relationship with a woman I met in undergrad. I am looking for some no-strings attached (unless you are into that!) fun. I guess what this is, is a no-commitment guarantee, and that doesn't depend on what your definition of "is" is. I am 6'0", 185 lbs, with brown hair and blue eyes. D/D free (most important) woman sought. I'll front any charges related to this encounter (i.e. drinks/hotel).

Please no pros.

Hot water

The building in which I work has been without hot water for almost a month now. This is a building which has been recognized asa MRSEC Technology Center and houses multi-million dollar funded research groups. You would think that getting some new heating elements for the boilers would be no problem. But, this is the email that I get today:

"Their is no hot water in the building. The hot water generator is bad. The
unit needs to be replaced. Physical Pant [sic] is getting bids on a replacement.
I have no idea to the time frame."

This is also a building in which we have had to cover up some of our lab equipment because the floor drains from the lab above leak into our lab. Who the hell is running this? How hard is it to get a hot water heater or a replacement elbow joint for a floor drain?

The Shrew and Smoking

So, one of our guests remarked about the proliferation of cigarette butts outside of our doors that open onto the roof. It seems that whenever the Shrew goes outside of her unit to smoke, she just flicks the butts over in front of our door. I also noticed a few match books out on the roof as well. I am thinking of leaving a flower pot with the word ashtray painted on the side to see if she gets the hint. Now is the time to do it, sothat she is in the habit of using the pot before it gets to be spring and I actually want to go out on the roof for nice fresh air.

The same guest also asked if our neighbors had a baby, because we heard some noises that actually did sound a lot like a baby. It turns out that something minor and insignificant happened in the Shrew's life that set her off. She was squealing and grunting and sobbing and shouting the same words over and over. It really did sound like a two year-old with a limited vocabulary having a temper tantrum. We heard her boyfriend tell her to calm down a few times, but to no avail. She got so worked up that all he could do was grunt and breathe heavily. I really haven't seen this type of behavior except in mental patients and over-sugared toddlers. At least now people don't think were nuts for trying to sell our place.

F1 Season is Open

Practice started today for the Grand Prix of Australia in Melbourne. The start of a new season of fun. But, will I get to watch it live, no? I have to go to the bar on Sunday afternoon and catch the tape delay. I could watch it live, but I have a "social function" to host. My fault for not checking the calendar last month when this thing was put together. And damn Comcast for not carrying Speed TV on their Digital Package. Otherwise I could watch it at home, not at a bar. Sipping my 50 cent/bottle beer rather than $4 per draft beer. Damn the bars for greatly overcharging for cheap beer. Maybe I should bring a flask and nurse one beer all afternoon, while retiring to the bathroom every commercial to take a tipple of whisky.

The Bad Plus

Has it really been four weeks? Hmmm.

I have been putting off picking up a CD by The Bad Plus for quite a few months now. But, thanks to my sister and her Border's gift card birthday present it has been accomplished. I got "These are the Vistas" because it was $8.00 cheaper than "Give." I had always heard good things about them, and had been looking for some jazz music that takes chances, but is still grounded in the classic style. That is what these guys are. They talk back and forth with some blistering pace and then quickly shift to reinforcing each other. Dissonance is their friend, but harmony is a little closer to their hips. And, hip they are.

Happy New Year

Ahhh, the Chinese New Year has arrived, the Year of the Cock no less. Last night was filled with Lion Dancers and firecrackers. It sounded a little like Bush had sent in the mighty forces of the US Marines to inavde Chinatown with all of the pops and explosions running through the night. Don't pick Chinese New Year's Eve to try and get to bed early so you can wake early in the morning. It just isn't going to happen. From 10:00 to 12:00 there was the banging of gongs and drums on our street, non-stop. Then as the clock struck midnight, the firecrackers started. The ground was covered in drifts of red paper where last week there had similar drifts of white snow.

So sit back, have a Tsing Tao and this time around, stick to your resolutions!

East-Central Alabama Bands

For anyone who is interested in seeing videos of some of the bands that are currently and have played around East-Central Alabama, check out

"BeBad Entertainment."

I have always been supportive of the ECA music scene, and I am currently working with the webmaster of that site to make available some mp3s of extinct bands from that region. If you have any files that might be of interest to BeBad, please contact them. In my opinion, some of the most unique bands have come from that region:

"ILCK3"

"The Whitey Herzogs"

"The Quadrajets"

"Baby Driver"

Toothless

"Man or Astro-man?"

She was doing so well

I guess The Shrew has been screwed, and I don't mean the good kind of screwing that has her moaning and screaming for three minutes every other day. It appears that the person living above her tried to fix his sink himself and ended up flooding her apartment. This flood ruined, from what I heard through the paper thin walls, her collection of purses and bags. "They're very important to me. I worked hard to collect these bags. Some of them can't be replaced because they are one of a kind." I could also hear that the guy is refusing to reimburse her for them immediately. "A year? A fucking year! I am not going to get my money for a year???!!! This has cost me $8000 so far in lost bags! Fuck him, fuck that motherfucker!"
Now, who in their right mind spends $8000 on purses and bags??? I mean, it would seem to me that this is a case of priorities being a little bit skewed. Granted, I feel bad that her stuff got ruined, and that the guy is being an asshole for not paying her as quickly as possible, but if you have $8000 in purses something is wrong. It is also wrong that she should be shrieking, and causing all her neighbors to deal with her problems. She constantly whines, "What did I ever do to deserve this?" Well for starters, the fact that she is the loudest resident in our building, and causes those around her to suffer is reason enough for me to think that she deserves this.
The best line from the night had to be, "I haven't even tried on half my clothes that got wet. They've probably all shrunk!" I wanted to yell out, "No you've just gotten fatter!"
My wife ran into The Shrew's boyfriend in the hall. He stated that their were workers coming in to fix the water damage, and that maybe The Shrew wouldn't have anything to complain about anymore. My wife said something to the effect of "We're certainly hoping." Now I feel sorry for the guy, having to deal with her firsthand, but it is a burden brought upon himself. He does his best to calm her down. Telling her that she is a child, but she just berates him for taking the side of the guy upstairs. Poor guy. So I really have no problem with him, afterall, last night night he told her she was full of shit. That took some guts. She ended up apologizing to him. I'm still waiting for my apology.

Reply from Wawa

Dear Mr. Elvis:

The Quality Assurance Department would like to thank you for taking the
time to contact us in regards to the Wawa Milk that you purchased at one
of our Wawa stores. We apologize that the product was not of the quality
expected and would like you to know that this situation will be
addressed with Wawa's dairy and the management team at the store. Wawa
Food Markets is committed to serving the freshest & highest quality
products to our customers. We will be sending you Wawa coupons that you
may use at any of our stores so that you have an additional opportunity
to enjoy some of Wawa's fresh and delicious products.

The Wawa Quality Assurance Team would like to thank you for
taking the time to contact us with your comments and concerns!

Two greatest "crap" lines in a movie

I was watching Grumpier Old Men yesterday while waiting for the wife to get out of the shower. It was on HBO early in the morning. Burgess Meredith was in it, and it occurred to me that he has the two greatest "crap" line in a movie.
The first is from Grumpy Old Men, and I think of it every time I count out some change. I do that a lot, as I try to use up my change as much as possible. Sometimes it annoys the folks at the register when you use 19 nickels and 4 pennies to pay for something that is $0.99.

"Relax. Kids swallow quarters all the time.... Sure! If she craps out two dimes and a nickel, then you can start worrying, huh?"

His other great line comes from Rocky, probably his most memorable role too. When he's trying to toughen Rocky up he tells him, "You're gonna eat lightnin' and you're gonna crap thunder!" I couldn't find a sound clip of it, too bad. For a little guy, he sure could motivate, probably better than that Tony Robbins guy. I could use someone like him in my lab.

Letter to Wawa

Dear Wawa,
I am not often moved enough to write a letter of complaint, but your store at 1038 Arch Street, Philadelphia, PA has been leaving me in a state of disgust lately. I have always had pleasant experiences with Wawas across the Mid-Atlantic, whether I am stopping in for gas, milk, or sandwiches. However, this particular store has had problems since my first visit there back in August, 2004.
My first complaint is with the freshness of dairy products being sold in the store. Often times when I go to purchase milk, the available bottles are past their "Sell By" date. The first time it happened, I chalked it up to a one time incident, but it has occurred several times in the past few months. Other area stores, such as CVS and Rite-Aid, usually carry milk that has at least five days left on the "Sell By" date. I am now making the extra two-block walk to those stores to purchase milk. It seems that this is a problem that could be solved by adjusting store inventory and delivery schedules.
The second complaint that I have deals with the friendliness of the some of the staff there. When attempting to pay with large ($20) bills or change, customers are often met with the attitude that it is a large problem to make or count change. The other day, my wife attempted to pay for two bottles of soda with a $10 bill. The employee could not find the "counterfeit detecting" marker and was refusing to take the bill. He finally relented when my wife suggested that she could go to the Wawa ATM and retrieve a $20 from it to pay. I guess it would have meant that he would have had to count out even more change!
I am only writing this because I have had nothing but positive experiences at other Wawas, and I believe that with a little effort the 1038 Arch Street location could be brought up to that same level of customer service that Wawa provides at its other locations.

Thank you for the opportunity to express my views.

And The Bar Kays... Wont Play... Soul Finger...

A feeling of helplessnes is overcoming me as I sit here writing this. Actually it has already overcome, and I am writing this a distract tion to get my mind off it. I also put on some music to try to get this sensation out of my stomach. The ILCK song "Let's Get Killed" usually puts me in a good mood, but it still hasn't come up on the shuffle of my playlist. Right now the Streets' "Fit But You Know It" is on, still a good song, but not what I need right now.
I should hit the forward button, but I have this thing about hurrying the media player through the playlist. Some little obsession that if I hit the forward button, I am ruining the anticipation leading up to the song I really want to hear. So I will just sit here and type away at this until I feel the giant thunder of Chet's Moon Dog through a bass amp hit my ear drums.
The DT's "Proud Man", well maybe one more song and it will come on.***
Proud. Am I proud right now? No. What I have I got to show for myself. Other than my wife, that is. I have no papers published, one poster presentation at a conference, and I haven't started the work I said I would start on Monday.
Here it is. Granted I haven't uploaded the EFUB version, just the Peel Sessions version. Still a rocking song, but not the best version
*** Ooh I ask for water, gave me gasoline ***
I think I am drinking too much... Dr. Pepper that is. Currently there are four bottles on my desk in various states of completion. Three are from today. I have this jittery feeling in my arms and in my chest that doesn't usually go away until I wake up the next morning. Then it is a another 60 - 72 oz. of Dr. Pepper throughout the day. I am sure the folks in Plano love people like me, but this has got to be adding to my health issues. I think I felt better overall when I was drinking that much beer every day.
*** OOh I ask for teachers, I get politicians ***
Isn't it true how much of life is governed by politics. And I'm not even talking about elections and laws. I am talking about everything that matters. I haven't done my thesis proposal yet, I get sideways glances from the chair all the time about it. Meanwhile he has two students who have been here one and two years longer than me respectively. They just gave their proposals within the last two months. Do you think they get the same looks? They should be getting it worse.
*** I ask for salvation, and I get stoned ***

Hockey, Hospitals, and Houses

This has been a year to rival 1986 for me. The Pats are back in the Superbowl, The Sox won the World Series, and Auburn finished 13-0. Now if the C's can just finish over 0.500 for the season my glow would shine a bit brighter. I guess I am forgetting about hockey, as most of the nation has. Too bad, the owners are only hurting themsleves, as are the players. Hopefully it won't die like women's soccer has.
The roads today were awful, and not having anything but 23 mm slicks on my bike, I didn't feel like braving it up to work. The last thing I need right now is a hospital bill. So it was back on my favorite metal box, SEPTA.
We are also semi-house hunting. We went out in the snow to see a few with our realtor. I noticed that every house we saw had a similar smell to it. They all smelled different, but only slightly. It was this wierd pet/onion/B.O. smell, that occurred no matter what section of the city we were in. I wonder if our condo will smell like that to someone else. I mean, I once broke up with a girl because I didn't like the smell of her apartment. Not that it was disgusting, I just didn't like it. People try to cover those scents with pot pouri, but you can still sense it, hiding behind the dried cinnamon and flowers. How long does it take to go away???

Truly Freezing?

The other night, the local new channel (Fox 29 for those wondering) was doing a story on how the cold was affecting the city. Granted they did provide a small amount of coverage on how the homeless shelters are completely open at these temperatures and on the dangers of carbon monoxide poisoning from heaters, but most of their coverage was about how it was affecting people who don't really suffer from the extreme cold.

"The cold is making it brutal for college students."

What kind of headline is that? Oh, the poor college students are cold as they scurry from their heated dorms to the heated classrooms. I think the university at which I work has made me completely apathetic to the droning complaints of undergraduates. There are tons of kids here dressed entirely in Polo, Nautica, and Brooks Bros. They whine when you give them homework that actually requires them to decipher a periodic table or, Heaven forbid, look up the volume formula for a cone! Next thing you know there will be headlines like, "Beer is making it difficult for students to get up for early morning classes." Worthless news. (Oxymoron!) The best part was that they ended the report with a shot of two people smoking with the announcer saying, "These two were able to brave the cold for a quick smoke." Fucking heroes for going out into the cold to kill themselves. Bravo, Fox!

Subway etiquette

Why is it that people who live in this city have trouble with Subway etiquette?

It never fails that as soon as the door opens, the people on the platform are trying their hardest to get in the car. No matter how many people need to get out. I was waiting outside the door to let riders exit before I got on, and this lady started pushing me from behind to try to get on. The driver will not leave the station while people are still trying to get off. You will get on the subway. Just wait your turn.

So now, everyone has gotten off the subway that needed to. It is my turn to enter. About three people who had shoved their way on before me stopped as soon as they got in the doors, refusing to move farther down the aisle to let others on. So I say excuse me and try to slip by them. They all give me rude looks as I try to get down the aisle. I made sure my bag hit at least one of them in the shoulder, some woman who wouldn't even acknowledge me when I excused myself. These people must think that if they move down the aisle a bit, or even shift a few inches to let me by, they will miss their stop. Now, I have always been able to get off the subway, no matter how crowded it is. And these aren't tourists either, but people who have lived here all their lives.

I hate the fcking subway system in this city. This is why I love riding my bike. It may take me a few minutes longer than the subway, but at least I don't have to deal with fat, smelly, selfish people who can't seem to gather the notion of what living in a society truly means. The subway is like a little micro-society. You can tell that these people who act like this on the subway act the same way out there in the world.

Nature's contempt for man. Or, Why I love the web.

My face felt fine at first, my chin tucked into the collar of my jacket, and my hat pulled low over my eyebrows. A constant wind from my left was taunting me the entire time. I refused to let it know that I noticed its presence. Looking straight ahead, not flinching one way or the other. A look to the left, and it would know I was searching for a sign that it would relent. A look to the right, and it would know that I was trying to hide from its stinging jab. I took a militaristic approach to waiting the wind out; straight ahead, eyes on the target, blocking all outside influences.
As time dragged on, the wind became more persistent. A light snow began to fall, further proving Nature's contempt for man today. The wind found ways beneath my defenses; the holes between the zipper's teeth and the gaps between the jacket's hem and my legs. It swirled up into my jacket, taking heat from my body and gently warming itself next to my skin. Others around me were defeated and left their desires unfulfilled. Still I waited.
Finally, the call came from within the weary, white truck. My time had come, my etched, pale hand reached into my pocket to remove what little money I had. The bills had become intertwined with my keys, the numbness in my fingers making it all the more difficult to remove them. I reached out, dropping the money into the woman's hand. She handed me my prize, wrapped in a white plastic bag.
I turned to leave, my back to my enemy, defiant. The wind, sensing that it had been beaten back during this skirmish swung around the building in haste, leaving the alley in a vacuum. The small flurries swirled upward bereft of gravity. The steps came easily to me, striding forward towards the open pass at the top of the alley. That is when the wind would strike. It had shifted and was driving the snow across the mouth of the alley in a horizontal assault on my weakened left side.
But, now my mission would allow me to turn and face the enemy head-on. I trudged into the brunt of the wind and snow, ducking my head below the crystalline barrage. Across the open streets and lots, spent flurries dancing at my feet. Until finally, the door to warmth was reached. Keys in hand, I was feeling the warmth before I even stepped inside.

I guess this a really bad way to describe my 10 minutes outside to get a bowl of wonton soup and a couple of egg rolls. God I love the web.

Snow brings an end to Peyton's reign!

MVP in this case must stand for Most oVer-rated Player. He deserves to start for the AFC in the Pro Bowl. He will perform wonderfully in the 80 degree Hawaiian weather. However, the only way that he will ever win a Super Bowl is if the Colts end up with home field advantage all the way through the playoffs, and if the big game is in a dome. He spent 8 of his 15 games in domes, and another 4 in what we'll call the South. His only visits to typically cold weather climes (Foxboro and Chicago) occurred, respectively, in the summer and against a God-awful team.
He handled himself well against the Pats the first time around. I actually planned the travel for my honeymoon such that we had a layover during the game. (I somehow managed to watch the Pats and two of three Sox v. Yanks games during the honeymoon w/out cutting into the amourous adventures of Us) New England showed that they were a better TEAM that week. This time around, the Pats had to go out and, for some reason, re-prove to everyone that they are a great TEAM. It was like the media had forgotten the Pats as a TEAM, because Manning threw for all those TDs. The lone bright spot for Indy in this game was Vander Jerk hitting a FG in relatively tough conditions.
So this morning the Pats are where they should be; 3-point favorites, on the road, against Pittsburgh. They are prediciting snow for that weekend in the Steel City, although that is a week away. I think this will be Big Ben's reality check. The Pats have Dillon, the defense is playing at a level like no other (without their starting CBs!), and Brady is getting the job done. I am looking forward to it.
And, by the way, Sean Salisbury's apology on Sportscenter this morning was noted by this Pat's fan. He will never pick against NE again this year. Not in our house, not on our watch. Bring us Philly.

A weekend away from The Shrew

I have a weekend away from The Shrew. We are heading up to my parents for a late-Christmas. I just hope that we get out of the airport on time. The last two trips to the airport have resulted in a combined 13 hours of delays.
The Shrew is free to bitch and moan all she wants. They can have loud raucous sex, and she can cry all she wants when the Eagles lose. Ha!

Starting this up again

From the response to a posting on bikeforums.net about that bitch of a neighbor of mine, people seem interested in hearing what she has to say. I am setting up an mp3 recorder in my domicile to record the ambient noise, which often includes here screaming.
Last night, we met with a realtor about selling the place. She (The Shrew) was doing so well, keeping realtively quiet, until she tried to send an email. Just as the realtor was getting ready to leave, she starts shreiking, "Work, work, work! Damnit! Why won't this fucking email send? " It was about a mintue and half of straight yelling that her email won't go through. You could hear her banging her mouse and keyboard. The realtor just looked at us, "It will be nice to get away from that..." I am thinking that I will need to slip her a twenty, and tell her to take a walk around the block when we have an open house. Besides she could stand to lose the weight.